All Things Religion Thread

...somewhere in the 'great void' ;)

https://m.

Optimist wrote:

AW I forgot to answer your question on where heaven is….its beyond earthly GPS coordinates,… but its in the north somewhere in the ‘great void’ if your actually interested in astronomy you will know what I’m talking about.
The bible references heaven a lot as being north of us….there is a lot of information on this if anyone is interested in looking…

Shit Opti! If the fairy bread and pearly gates are to the north, i dread to think what's to the south!
That aint Antarctica!

Optimist wrote:

There may be imposters and ‘so called ‘ followers that way inclined especially in the Roman world imposter church, but the FOUNDER of the faith spoke clearly what happens to those who offend children.
He would also like us to be like little kids and live a more innocent / harmless life…
Matthew 18:3.

Pell?

Optimist wrote:

AW I forgot to answer your question on where heaven is….its beyond earthly GPS coordinates,… but its in the north somewhere in the ‘great void’ if your actually interested in astronomy you will know what I’m talking about.
The bible references heaven a lot as being north of us….there is a lot of information on this if anyone is interested in looking…

Optimist. Hope you and your family are well.

You’ve taken the time to listen my Life After Death spiel , it would be polite for me to reciprocate and look at what you’ve just posted.

Firstly, I’ just making my way back from Kepler425b , the planet with the most ‘earth like’ conditions , it’s from the north and I believe it was just a footy kick away from Heaven.
From what I could see of Heaven there was much commotion and it looked like there was plenty of competition for entry into the ground, the fanfare, the jostling, it was mesmerising.
I could clearly see two entry turnstiles, Sinners and Do Gooders, from what I could make out , Sinners had the largest queue, some 1200 light years long, even had a grandstand with Pell written on it, whatever that means.

Heavens capacity to hold big numbers was remarkable.., waiting list beyond comprehension.
Clear skies prevailed, I could see for light years in a non-gravity space.
I looked down to see some real players, Optimist, ( he was as busy as single groomsmen at a wedding), Ashsam, well, ( he was darting around with much uncertainty) , fit looking second year player, must be his diet and fasting regime, boy could he run, ( he ran so far away, like a Flock of Seagulls).
Scored all the time, his wife had reptilian beauty and scythed her way through the queue for an easy entry (into the ground), even produced two live young.

Heaven is rocky, it has a nickel/iron core, contains nearly all the other elements to produce ‘life as we know it’ (Jim) , sadly, and ultimately it’ll never get up, because it lacks real life and belief.

I’ve one issue , I’m travelling at such a rate I fear I’ll burn up upon reaching the corona of the Ozone and suffocate on triatomic molecules. I’ll never get back to Heaven, ‘but it must be there’. A bit of fun, each to their own, without malice. AW

It's been quite the few days in Optiland.
He believes FNP are only about 4000 years old, that Mungo Man is bullshit but that Methuselah and the Adamites lived for a thousand years, that the Old Testament is a factual history book, Noah and the Ark and the great flood that smited all the sinners was real, except Opti knows it was four of each animal not two.
Noah was a guy that was probably a few hundred years old himself I think Opti put in there too.
He knows that Heaven is not only a real place, and how to get there, he knows where it is actually located in the universe, the "great void to the north" ( is that his brain he is talking about?), and knows a few people who have actually been there as well.
Tops out with a dig at other beliefs, Muhammed the pedo, the "Roman imposters" who I think are the Catholics.
Finally, he reveals God also speaks to him.
In person.
A message about these threads too, who to forgive on Swellnet.
Guy and Jelly.
Hilarious. Glad I didn't make the cut on that Opti list.
I wonder if God is a subscriber on SN or if he just does what Indo does, you know, freeloads.
Maybe God was actually trying to get Jelly to find Him one of those "Doin' your Mom" clips so he could message it to Jesus as a joke.
An enjoyable read and thread as far as I'm concerned.
Don't go changing Opti.
Great entertainment.

haha, AW, classic (even had a soundtrack). You and adam12 should have Opti round for a movie night, I'd recommend Ad Astra, he'd have some interesting insights into the film's inaccuracies.

ha. Very entertaining AW and A12. Cheers for the Friday arvo laugh.
And Opti, i admire your conviction. Whatever our beliefs, right or wrong, and who knows the difference anyway.. it's good to have conviction and a bit of passion.

burleigh wrote:

Optimist wrote:

And the prophet they follow liked them around 9 years old….great role model.

ummmmmm, plenty or priests like that too champ.

Sadly there has been many Christian/Catholic ministers especially in the past who have preyed on children but it's not encouraged as part of Christian culture like it could be said it is by muslim culture and teaching's

For example:

"The hypocrisy of child abuse in many Muslim countries

Child marriage and pederasty are tolerated in Muslim societies where homosexuality is strictly condemned

Some Muslims are fond of condemning western morality – alcoholism, nudity, premarital sex and homosexuality often being cited as examples. But Muslims do not have a monopoly on morality. In the west, child marriages and sex with children are illegal. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for many Muslim countries.

I recently saw the documentary on the Dancing Boys of Afghanistan. It exposed an ancient custom called "bacha bazi" (boy for play), where rich men buy boys as young as 11 from impoverished families for sexual slavery. The boys are dressed in women's clothes and made to dance and sing at parties, before being carted away by the men for sex. Owning boys is considered a symbol of status and one former warlord boasted of having up to 3,000 boys over a 20-year period, even though he was married, with two sons. The involvement of the police and inaction of the government means this form of child prostitution is widespread."

Continued

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2010/apr/25/middle-east-child-...

Ha ha glad I’m entertaining you guys..
The universe is a big place and once you release your mind from the bounds of your fleshy existence, something amazing happens….you are no longer the ant who doesn’t believe in humans because they are just too big to comprehend….
All of a sudden God can get through to you and all manner of things revealed.
If I told you what I really know you would have me locked up ha ha…
But at least these days you wouldn’t nail me to a tree like my Lord…or would you.?..
Yeh He was another crazy guy….talking crazy stuff…
But hey being an ant who likes antworld is nice…good for you.
…..keep an eye on your nest though …something bigger you can’t yet comprehend may come along and poke holes in it.

Optimist wrote:

Ha ha glad I’m entertaining you guys..
The universe is a big place and once you release your mind from the bounds of your fleshy existence, something amazing happens….you are no longer the ant who doesn’t believe in humans because they are just too big to comprehend….
All of a sudden God can get through to you and all manner of things revealed.
If I told you what I really know you would have me locked up ha ha…
But at least these days you wouldn’t nail me to a tree like my Lord…or would you.?..
Yeh He was another crazy guy….talking crazy stuff…
But hey being an ant who likes antworld is nice…good for you.
…..keep an eye on your nest though …something bigger you can’t yet comprehend may come along and poke holes in it.

Optimist. Hi mate. You have a good sense of humour and I value that. It’s Friday, I’ve had too many cups of tea, someone turned off the swell and offshore wind switch here on the surf coast, me and other mates are getting desperate and are going silly.
I never pray, but if you’ve got any sort of connection to anything, please muster up some offshore decent surf, I know you can do it, with thanks. AW

I worked with a Greek bloke who at staff lunches used drink a bottle of cat's piss otherwise known as retsina. Petros was Greek Orthodox and married with a few kids, anyway, after drinking the bottle he used to get this look in his eye and start muttering such gems as "women are for babies boys are of pleasure". Petros was pretty harmless (and legless after the retsina I must say) and the rest of us used to laugh it off, but on reflection maybe there was something in that Jane Kittson joke about the Greek's inventing the back door and they have been using it ever since. Note: no cat's piss was consumed in researching this post.

@info you resurchin cub reporting animal you quoting a 14 year old article, and the Jimmy Olsen award goes to @info

Heaven in the northern sky they say??

…somewhere, far far away, in a galaxy of planetary entertainment
- and beyond the ‘great void’ between flopti’s ears ;)

…seekers and adventurers of the universe strode forth with smiles and laughter, exhibiting true childlike qualities of joyous humour and wonder
- and thine entertainment was free of self deluded fictional theories, and thou reality was without imagined and fabricated superstitious fantasy ;)

… with thy immortal princess hairstyle and divine determination of thine flopti scratching his wormhole into submission, there was but one question :

- ‘can u feel it?’ ;);)

View this post on Instagram

AlfredWallace wrote:

Optimist wrote:

Ha ha glad I’m entertaining you guys..
The universe is a big place and once you release your mind from the bounds of your fleshy existence, something amazing happens….you are no longer the ant who doesn’t believe in humans because they are just too big to comprehend….
All of a sudden God can get through to you and all manner of things revealed.
If I told you what I really know you would have me locked up ha ha…
But at least these days you wouldn’t nail me to a tree like my Lord…or would you.?..
Yeh He was another crazy guy….talking crazy stuff…
But hey being an ant who likes antworld is nice…good for you.
…..keep an eye on your nest though …something bigger you can’t yet comprehend may come along and poke holes in it.

Optimist. Hi mate. You have a good sense of humour and I value that. It’s Friday, I’ve had too many cups of tea, someone turned off the swell and offshore wind switch here on the surf coast, me and other mates are getting desperate and are going silly.
I never pray, but if you’ve got any sort of connection to anything, please muster up some offshore decent surf, I know you can do it, with thanks. AW

AW, 3rd day in a row of off shore all day here on the NC, SW and 3-4ft, very rare.
It works :)

ashsam wrote:

AlfredWallace wrote:

Optimist wrote:

Ha ha glad I’m entertaining you guys..
The universe is a big place and once you release your mind from the bounds of your fleshy existence, something amazing happens….you are no longer the ant who doesn’t believe in humans because they are just too big to comprehend….
All of a sudden God can get through to you and all manner of things revealed.
If I told you what I really know you would have me locked up ha ha…
But at least these days you wouldn’t nail me to a tree like my Lord…or would you.?..
Yeh He was another crazy guy….talking crazy stuff…
But hey being an ant who likes antworld is nice…good for you.
…..keep an eye on your nest though …something bigger you can’t yet comprehend may come along and poke holes in it.

Optimist. Hi mate. You have a good sense of humour and I value that. It’s Friday, I’ve had too many cups of tea, someone turned off the swell and offshore wind switch here on the surf coast, me and other mates are getting desperate and are going silly.
I never pray, but if you’ve got any sort of connection to anything, please muster up some offshore decent surf, I know you can do it, with thanks. AW

AW, 3rd day in a row of off shore all day here on the NC, SW and 3-4ft, very rare.
It works :)

Ashsam. Hi , you’re a good sport.

Yeah, well can’t you turn the universe around so you guys can have our shite and us guys have your, ‘heaven’. Not looking anywhere decent until next Thursday. Have a good weekend.AW

Jelly Flater wrote:

…somewhere, far far away, in a galaxy of planetary entertainment
- and beyond the ‘great void’ between flopti’s ears ;)

…seekers and adventurers of the universe strode forth with smiles and laughter, exhibiting true childlike qualities of joyous humour and wonder
- and thine entertainment was free of self deluded fictional theories, and thou reality was without imagined and fabricated superstitious fantasy ;)

… with thy immortal princess hairstyle and divine determination of thine flopti scratching his wormhole into submission, there was but one question :

- ‘can u feel it?’ ;);)

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C6jYosSuPpD/?igsh=ZTlhazdmcmEwaHI1

JellyFlater. Hi mate. Hope ya well, yeah, but, can you dig it ?

SHAFT, so good, what a soundtrack. AW

GuySmiley wrote:

@info you resurchin cub reporting animal you quoting a 14 year old article, and the Jimmy Olsen award goes to @info

It's what came up in a quick google search, i saw Guardian and thought great good to use, it saves some nonsense about bias or complaints about Murdoch or some other nonsense.

Does it matter if it's 14 years old? ..

^ ha ha AW, styling ;)

- shaft....
an almost religious event, in and of itself, created from and existing within one's own merciful magnificence, playing out in the midst of an intergalactic battle between the go(o)d and the (d)evil - culminating in a ceremony of parading robes.... with divine soothing tones, dancing in devotion to a procession of adoring adherents who, in unison, worship a boss with a deep booming voice whose silky smooth descriptive authoritarian storytellian georgeorwellian creative juices flow...

May u keep praying to Huey for a decent autumn pulse AW ;)
- and ye shall be rewardeth

;)

https://m.

Jelly Flater wrote:

^ ha ha AW, styling ;)

- shaft....
an almost religious event, in and of itself, created from and existing within one's own merciful magnificence, playing out in the midst of an intergalactic battle between the go(o)d and the (d)evil - culminating in a ceremony of parading robes.... with divine soothing tones, dancing in devotion to a procession of adoring adherents who, in unison, worship a boss with a deep booming voice whose silky smooth descriptive authoritarian storytellian georgeorwellian creative juices flow...

May u keep praying to Huey for a decent autumn pulse AW ;)
- and ye shall be rewardeth

JellyFlater. Very, very good, that’s almost, well, godly.

To Huey, I’ve got my head down, face and knees on the mat, but beware, The Shaft!!!!.AW

indo-dreaming wrote:

GuySmiley wrote:

@info you resurchin cub reporting animal you quoting a 14 year old article, and the Jimmy Olsen award goes to @info

It's what came up in a quick google search, i saw Guardian and thought great good to use, it saves some nonsense about bias or complaints about Murdoch or some other nonsense.

Does it matter if it's 14 years old? ..

The problem is it’s a bigoted equivocation to denigrate all of the Muslim faith when what you describe is not exclusive to any one religion. It’s more about stupid rules ( no sex before marriage) and power dynamics. We can see the fundamentalism of any religion creates huge problems.
Opti doubles down on your original post and I guess there’s a few who sigh and think “ not this horse shit again “

That’s just what I think

indo-dreaming wrote:

GuySmiley wrote:

@info you resurchin cub reporting animal you quoting a 14 year old article, and the Jimmy Olsen award goes to @info

It's what came up in a quick google search, i saw Guardian and thought great good to use, it saves some nonsense about bias or complaints about Murdoch or some other nonsense.

Does it matter if it's 14 years old? ..

The problem is it’s a bigoted equivocation to denigrate all of the Muslim faith when what you describe is not exclusive to any one religion. It’s more about stupid rules ( no sex before marriage) and power dynamics. We can see the fundamentalism of any religion creates huge problems.
Opti doubles down on your original post and I guess there’s a few who sigh and think “ not this horse shit again “

That’s just what I think

Funny the thread that 99.8% of those commenting on don’t even believe in, gets the most comments everyday.
Dumb as lol

- well ummm ;)

Some are 'can u feel it?'
- others are 'give me your love' ;);)

...all man made whichever planet u imagine
(all things religion)

https://m.

"The perceived unquestionable authority of religious figures and their claimed unique and vital relationships to the divine realm is a feature of religious authority- one that plays an important role in the grooming of children in religious settings "

https://www.qualitativecriminology.com/pub/osa148h6/release/2

Optimist wrote:

Ha ha glad I’m entertaining you guys..
The universe is a big place and once you release your mind from the bounds of your fleshy existence, something amazing happens….you are no longer the ant who doesn’t believe in humans because they are just too big to comprehend….
All of a sudden God can get through to you and all manner of things revealed.
If I told you what I really know you would have me locked up ha ha…
But at least these days you wouldn’t nail me to a tree like my Lord…or would you.?..
Yeh He was another crazy guy….talking crazy stuff…
But hey being an ant who likes antworld is nice…good for you.
…..keep an eye on your nest though …something bigger you can’t yet comprehend may come along and poke holes in it.

What do you think about Pell?

ashsam wrote:

Funny the thread that 99.8% of those commenting on don’t even believe in, gets the most comments everyday.
Dumb as lol

I don't believe in Santa, the Easter bunny or the tooth fairy either.
Dumb as. lol

Gold @supa!

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

Funny the thread that 99.8% of those commenting on don’t even believe in, gets the most comments everyday.
Dumb as lol

I don't believe in Santa, the Easter bunny or the tooth fairy either.
Dumb as. lol

Stick to your woke agendas hypocrite

soggydog wrote:

indo-dreaming wrote:

GuySmiley wrote:

@info you resurchin cub reporting animal you quoting a 14 year old article, and the Jimmy Olsen award goes to @info

It's what came up in a quick google search, i saw Guardian and thought great good to use, it saves some nonsense about bias or complaints about Murdoch or some other nonsense.

Does it matter if it's 14 years old? ..

The problem is it’s a bigoted equivocation to denigrate all of the Muslim faith when what you describe is not exclusive to any one religion. It’s more about stupid rules ( no sex before marriage) and power dynamics. We can see the fundamentalism of any religion creates huge problems.
Opti doubles down on your original post and I guess there’s a few who sigh and think “ not this horse shit again “

That’s just what I think

Oh sorry my apologies i forgot we can only bag the shit out of Christians and their faith here and do it day after day and directly mock peoples beliefs to their faces like is done to Optimist and Ashsam.

But be critical of Islam or muslims who there aren't even any here that we know of and its all "bigoted equivocation to denigrate all of the Muslim faith" or calls of Islamphobia like AW the other day.

The reality is all religion has outdated ideas but not all religion is equal in how backwards they are today, some religions have seen great reform adapting to changes in society for instance women Christian minsters are not unusual and even gay ministers are a thing, and the influence of Christianity on a society or government is not what it once was or anything like Islamic countries where they are strongly intertwined.

For instance even in places like Gaza being gay can see you jailed or thrown from a roof top, drinking alcohol illegal even sex outside of marriage is illegal, and brings such shame on the family that honor killings are a thing and if go to court killers rarely prosecuted.

Women and LGBTQI community in much of the middle east are basically true second class citizens who cant even go outside without covering hair and legs shoulders etc in climates that are stinking hot, in some middle eastern countries its even illegal to leave Islam and some countries can be punishable by death.

When we go travel and go through all these security checks and crazy things like restrictions on liquids, its not because of any threat from radical Christians or radical Hindus or Buddhist, its because of the very real threat of radical Islam.

If there is one religion in this world that deserves criticism and pressure to reform its islam and it sure doesn't need people like you protecting it.

BTW. Religious views against sex before marriage long ago makes sense, they didnt have the contraception we now have or protection or treatment of STD's, if it had been socially acceptable for men to just go shag who they wanted with no commitment (which marriage is) there would be all these single women with kids and no provider and STD's would be rampant.

“ BTW. Religious views against sex before marriage long ago makes sense, they didnt have the contraception we now have or protection or treatment of STD's, if it had been socially acceptable for men to just go shag who they wanted with no commitment (which marriage is) there would be all these single women with kids and no provider and STD's would be rampant.”

Indo giving sex-ed classes now.
That’s enough internet for me today and it’s only just started. Struth!

goofyfoot wrote:

“ BTW. Religious views against sex before marriage long ago makes sense, they didnt have the contraception we now have or protection or treatment of STD's, if it had been socially acceptable for men to just go shag who they wanted with no commitment (which marriage is) there would be all these single women with kids and no provider and STD's would be rampant.”

Indo giving sex-ed classes now.
That’s enough internet for me today and it’s only just started. Struth!

Ok troll can you argue that its not true?

ashsam wrote:

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

Funny the thread that 99.8% of those commenting on don’t even believe in, gets the most comments everyday.
Dumb as lol

I don't believe in Santa, the Easter bunny or the tooth fairy either.
Dumb as. lol

Stick to your woke agendas hypocrite

lol lol lol.
poor little fella.

;)

https://m.

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

Funny the thread that 99.8% of those commenting on don’t even believe in, gets the most comments everyday.
Dumb as lol

I don't believe in Santa, the Easter bunny or the tooth fairy either.
Dumb as. lol

Stick to your woke agendas hypocrite

lol lol lol.
poor little fella.

little, if you can match up to 6'3" and 90kg let me know weasel

ashsam wrote:

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

Funny the thread that 99.8% of those commenting on don’t even believe in, gets the most comments everyday.
Dumb as lol

I don't believe in Santa, the Easter bunny or the tooth fairy either.
Dumb as. lol

Stick to your woke agendas hypocrite

lol lol lol.
poor little fella.

little, if you can match up to 6'3" and 90kg let me know weasel

“if you can match up to 6'3" and 90kg let me know”

Keyboard tough guy makes childish threat in a surf forum.

LOL!!!
Btw, what would your god think of yout online behaviour?...(speaking of hypocrisy and all).

goofyfoot wrote:

“ BTW. Religious views against sex before marriage long ago makes sense, they didnt have the contraception we now have or protection or treatment of STD's, if it had been socially acceptable for men to just go shag who they wanted with no commitment (which marriage is) there would be all these single women with kids and no provider and STD's would be rampant.”

Indo giving sex-ed classes now.
That’s enough internet for me today and it’s only just started. Struth!

Sadly, I’m thinking that the penny will only drop for @info when his kids hit that magical age when everything is questioned, his black and white logic is likely to go over like a lead balloon

https://m.

GuySmiley wrote:

goofyfoot wrote:

“ BTW. Religious views against sex before marriage long ago makes sense, they didnt have the contraception we now have or protection or treatment of STD's, if it had been socially acceptable for men to just go shag who they wanted with no commitment (which marriage is) there would be all these single women with kids and no provider and STD's would be rampant.”

Indo giving sex-ed classes now.
That’s enough internet for me today and it’s only just started. Struth!

Sadly, I’m thinking that the penny will only drop for @info when his kids hit that magical age when everything is questioned, his black and white logic is likely to go over like a lead balloon

Can you argue the above about sex before marriage beliefs is not true?

And your views are also just as black and white as mine.

Anyway dont bother answering my question, i dont want to distract you from your daily anti Christian bile and mocking of beliefs made towards Optimist

^ haha... z eggspurt ;)

https://m.

;);)

https://m.

southernraw wrote:

LOL!!!
Btw, what would your god think of yout online behaviour?...(speaking of hypocrisy and all).

you obviously have no sense of humour

Roadkill wrote:

ashsam wrote:

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

Funny the thread that 99.8% of those commenting on don’t even believe in, gets the most comments everyday.
Dumb as lol

I don't believe in Santa, the Easter bunny or the tooth fairy either.
Dumb as. lol

Stick to your woke agendas hypocrite

lol lol lol.
poor little fella.

little, if you can match up to 6'3" and 90kg let me know weasel

“if you can match up to 6'3" and 90kg let me know”

Keyboard tough guy makes childish threat in a surf forum.

ha ha dill another mchypocrite, how's mummy did you have to kill someone cause she got covid in a cafe from the unvaxed lol
guess not
swellnets dipstick comment of the century

- don't give up stinky!
& enjoy ya sandwich haha

;)

https://m.

ashsam wrote:

Roadkill wrote:

ashsam wrote:

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

southernraw wrote:

ashsam wrote:

Funny the thread that 99.8% of those commenting on don’t even believe in, gets the most comments everyday.
Dumb as lol

I don't believe in Santa, the Easter bunny or the tooth fairy either.
Dumb as. lol

Stick to your woke agendas hypocrite

lol lol lol.
poor little fella.

little, if you can match up to 6'3" and 90kg let me know weasel

“if you can match up to 6'3" and 90kg let me know”

Keyboard tough guy makes childish threat in a surf forum.

ha ha dill another mchypocrite, how's mummy did you have to kill someone cause she got covid in a cafe from the unvaxed lol
guess not
swellnets dipstick comment of the century

“ha ha dill another mchypocrite, how's mummy did you have to kill someone cause she got covid in a cafe from the unvaxed lol”

Well, that makes perfect sense.

- and something for noinfo ;)
... aka the sick dingle

;);)

https://m.

No wonder Surfline doesn't have a forum.
Embarrassing.

ashsam wrote:

southernraw wrote:

LOL!!!
Btw, what would your god think of yout online behaviour?...(speaking of hypocrisy and all).

you obviously have no sense of humour

Backpedalling? Proving once again what a small man you are. Poor little thing.

- haha, poor lil trashcan ;)
... jump on yer bike stinky!

;);)

https://m.