An Ode to the Eggbeater
It's a quirk of the natural world that apex predators seek enemies. Despite an unchallenged position at the top of the pile the big cheese need their foes in order to create balance. Because, you see, all that excess vigour and vim has gotta go somewhere and without an enemy upon whom to focus it they begin to turn on each other.
At the moment SUP's are serving that purpose in grand style.
As an enemy they are a perfect fit for surfers. With a 12 foot board and paddle the fuckers can be accused of wave stealing, while overblown claims to waterman lineage leave 'em open to charges of wankerism, and 'surfing as core strength training' just sounds so damn serious.
So enemies they are and I'll do my bit to spread the animosity. And yet, as I loathe those stand up bastards sweeping for their SUPper I must admit to a warm longing for our old enemy who've been hunted to extinction – the humble goat boat.
Eggbeaters were great because the potential for serious injury, and hence mirth among the surfing fraternity, was far greater than with SUP's. And with odd tans on the front of their legs, hips swivelling wildly and a propensity to get caught inside with nought they could do about it goat boats provided endless humour. Like ducks they were; always funny, even the angry ones.
So when it comes to enemies - real or imagined - gimme a flailing goat boat slipping backwards over-the-falls while strapped into his rig over a puffed up SUP anyday.
Rest In Peace dear eggbeater.
(All photos except the last one from Roger Shackleton's All About Wave Skis. The last one, which looks horribly awkward but I've no doubt is a difficult thing to do, was pilfered off an eggbeating website)
Comments
Tandem goatboating?
Now that's a recipe for a hot date.
Or a paddle to the head.
hilarious! indeed, there is nothing funny about get clubbed by a gigantic board with mandatory idiot attached
There's a group of em that go out at Manly on the weekends. See one out at the Bower occasionally too. SUP's crap on them as far as the annoyance factor goes IMO. SUP's are out of control. More each day and less skilled. Manly is becoming SUP central.
The SUP's are out of control on the reefs around Flinders in Vic. Every old fool with more money than sense has put their mals into storage because with these new boats, the waves don't have to be any where near braking before they can climb aboard. So now, they can COMPLETELY MONOPOLISE the break and catch every wave, not just every second one. Four guys out at a break and it is stuffed, and they get all high and mighty when the kids drop in on them, GO FIGURE.
Would love to know whats going through the mind of the guy in the first pic!! Ha Ha
I have been surfing on a wave ski for over 30 years competed at state ,national and world comps, so I guess I know what I am doing. What still baffels me is you get judged on the type of equipment you use instead of your ability,there are a hell of a lot more kooks out there on short and longboards who think they can surf.To me surfing is about getting out there with your mates and enjoying what nature has to offer, so grow up and get on with life.
I can't agree more goaty. Surfing should be about fun regardless of what you ride.
As for out of control SUPs at Manly that's funny because last few times I surfed at Manly there were more out of control backpackers on short and longboards that anything else.
Hey, I resent that!
No, not really ha ha, there is nothing better than seeing someone a goat boat go over the falls (maybe if they'rer wearing a Gath). And as someone who has been on the recieving end of it...there is honestly few scarier things in life!
Personally I prefer riding my goatie in small waves that would be rubbish to surf on a shorty or even a ma as they are still pretty exciting.
I sstruggle with SUPs. This is a converstaion I had with a 20 year old chick.
Chick: "I'm learning to SUP"
Me: "what made you choose a SUP?"
Chick; " I tried surfing but couldn't stand up, but on a SUP you're already standing up so it's easier"
Me "Oh dear God"
So yes, we potentially have hordes of people in the surf on 15ft logs..who can't stand up and thus can't ride a wave.
Maybe I need to buy a gath hat.
A few times I have seen some mysto fella paddle out Cronulla Point on a goat boat and get pitted off his head. Only when it is over six foot is when I have seen him. Couldn't believe the quality of his surfing.
Our numbers might have died off over the last 10 years but the ones that still surf can hold their own in the line up. My theory on why numbers have dropped is that surfing a waveski in heavy conditions is not that easy by that I mean if you can not duck dive your ski or if you have too undo your seat belt every time you stack it and you are left groveling around in the white water waiting for the next set on the head you soon loose interest and then a longboard seems a better option.Over here in WA we have some real heavy breaks so you learn quick or you give it away.
@ Billie
That'd be Steve the Dentist. Always has a fair dig when the Point is at size. Rumour has it that he was the model for the Oral B ads, 'this man is a dentist so we can't show you his face'.
there were a couple of guys in newcastle doing airs, air 360s and alley oop type stuff in the early 80's on skis well before any standup surfers....i think at one stage one of them was the world champ for few seasons ..they certainly had a dig!
So eggbeaters were actually the aerial pioneers, Prawnhead, and surfers just following their lead?
Woah, it doesn't bear thinking about. I'm gonna have to sit me down a while.
in our defence they still had their paddles in the water on occaision(85 ish )and a lot of them had back issues, like a lot of the pro's and grommets now have knee and ankle issues...i used to think about trying them ....lots of old footage of guys doing massive flickouts at pipe and waimea from the hunter theatre in Newy at the junction and goodvibes and juan kempes were doing them well back in the 70's when i didn't even know what a reefer or a spliff was and thought that comic strip could be a lot nicer with some bright colours just like the Flash or Spiderman
aerial pioneers were the windsurfers cabrinha and naish and co although i would be happy to stand corrected on that
sup's are the new goatboats i concur
You a dead right prawnhead waveski,s started pulling airs in the early 80,s. That guy in the photos above is Cristo he is an 8 time Australian champion and a 4 time world champion . I have some footage of him surfing backdoor pipe I also have footage of a guy called Reece Duncan pulling 3 airs and 1 reo on a double overhead wave at Indo.
For any one that is interested waveski surfing australia have a web site with links to everything to do with waveski surfing.
Thanks for the story Swellnet - even though it wasn't exactly complementry, I'm stoked to see any story about waveskiing at all, to be compared favourably with anyone, and to be called something different. You can see from the comments that we watch the surf media like anyone else - and try to surf like (good) shortboarders. I agree some thngs are harder (getting trhough white water and coordinating more gear) but also easier (airs and barell rolls becasue whe're strapped in). Yep, the sport's contracting but in a way it's good becasue the proportion of waveskiiers who know what they're doing vs don't has prob increased. I reckon that standups should try to differntiate between the two before any assumptions are made / hassling goes on, which is def getting better also. Otherwise, the sports still ticking over - see http://www.waveskisurfingaust.com/
Totally agree with the SUP stuff, give me the goaties any day. Fkn SUP's should be banned forever.
Does anyone remember the old dude at greenmount that used to use his arms instead of a paddle?
Just got home from a week on the south coast of west oz ,epic conditions for the first 3 days solid head to head and a half offshore wedging beach break , myself and 2 waveski mates amongst short boards,body boards and a couple of long boards great vibe no snaking or drop ins sometimes surfing is just how it should be.
try Kneeboarding, then you dont have to stand up, or sit down and everybody is happy. remember that the give way rule still applies tho.
cheers. enjoy what ever you ride , see you in the soup !!!
two of my mates nearly drowned at Phillip Island after being hit by a bombie set. if the Third of the three Stooges wasnt riding a Goatboat i would have been going to a double funeral.
enjoy what ever you ride, and stay safe. Cheers
It's all true Stu. While eggbeaters were more a nuisance, SUP's endanger the lives of all around. Ski's never quite got the numbers the way SUP's have though.
There used to be these regulars at north end Maroubra on just about every weekend morning, in particular one loudmoth fellow who I think even his fellow eggbeaters used to get jack of.
But as he was largely useless on the thing it didn't matter, and the constant jabbering was always hilarious as he talked himself up something fierce.
I also saw the funniest waveski smashing ever at the north end Maroubra on a very crowded and fairly sizable day. The entire north end plus onlookers were pissing themselves.
SUP's, there's just nothing to laugh about. Even the highly competent are a danger to their fellow man, and quite frankly 99% are not even remotely competent and seemingly have no idea how much momentum those tankers have.
I'm looking forward to stories about old buggers having their hips dislocated from the sheer momentum of those things after they fall off.
Get a goat boat up ya.
I was out the other day and was told that that my surfcraft was dangerous and that I shouldn't be there. I thought it was unjustified since it wasn't really a huge day, I was staying out of everybody's way and meanwhile everybody else's loose boards were flying everywhere. Why did I offend him so much? By being different? Like kids inherently hate the different kid at school? I appreciate genuine concerns for safety, but sometimes they seem to cloak prejudice. Perhaps one day we all will be able to tolerate each other. In the mean time I will be out there exchanging pleasantries and sharing waves with my fellow man.
Any surf craft can be dangerous to yourself and others ,it is at its peak on small crowded breaks. I think the answer is if you do not feel comfortable with the conditions do not go out and if you do go out make sure you play by the rules.On a recent trip to the Maldives we surfed a break called jails which is a screaming right hander,some of the surfers out there were right out of their comfort zone, nothing worse than paddling into a serious wave only to have people going over the falls in front of you,it happens to every one at some stage ,there is an endless supply of waves ,be aware of who is around you.
True enough, any surfcraft can be dangerous in the hands of a novice. Any experienced surfer will know that even a shortboard can be dangerous even in experienced hands.
My point is that there is no level of competence where SUPs aren't dangerous to all around them. They are way out of proportion to the human being who is apparently in control of them.
A shortboard means that you have control in most situation, a mal in some situations. The only situation where a SUP is not dangerous is when the waves are 1' or less, or when the rider is not within 50 metres of any other surfer or swimmer.
It's just risk management. If you ride a SUP and think you are in control of it, you just haven't worked out reality yet, and you endanger everyone.
Move away from all human beings if you insist on riding these abominations.
@mcdog
I remember that old digger, he'd sit way out wide on this giant 14ft blue styro monster and knee paddle into green walls then get to his feet and assume the position. He was so skinny his wetsuit was baggy.