To ride or not to ride, that is the question—
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The dings and damage of the ocean,
Or to hang 'ponst your wall.

Should you ride old surfboards, or just hang them on your wall lest they get further damaged? Last month I asked this question of the Vintage Surfboard Collectors group on Facebook. My own tendency was not to ride old boards yet some of the replies I received had me thinking otherwise. "They were made to be ridden," was a common refrain, yet the most compelling was that riding the boards allowed you a visceral connection mere history couldn't provide. I can dig that, and so this month's Board Bazaar - running a bit late, I know, I know - only features boards I'd buy to ride.

I recently read a comment by Phil Myers that he showed one of his Hydro Tails to Tommy Peterson before Peterson shaped his Fireball Fish. The Fireball, which features a similar step as the Hydro Tail, was ridden to fame by Tom Curren. So did Peterson 'borrow' Myers' design? Ah, yet more history to unweave! Anyhoo, this board was shaped for Curren when he was sponsored by The Realm, it has a Phil Myers-inspired step tail, Curren's name on the bottom, and a set of tits on the deck. 14 bids took it to $600.

As a youngster I was always thrown by the names of Vicco board shapers: Strapper, Trigger, Springer...I'm sure there were more following the same verbal rhythm but I can't think of them now. This Springer Stinger - correctly called Da Sting by Ben Aipa but I ain't gonna stop da riddim now - is an Aussie version of the Hawaiian shape. All it lacks is the step on the bottom - is that where Phil Myers got the idea from? It's in reasonable condition and looks a barrel of fun to ride. 6 bids took it to $122.

The best thing about this McCoy-shaped Lazer Zap isn't its outstanding condition, or its lolly pop colour scheme, nor even that it comes with both McCoy endorsed skinny fin and Lexcen star fin. No, the best thing about this board is that Geoff has written the name 'Cowshit' above the stringer. What sort of a nickname is Cowshit? And who would endorse it by asking to have it scrawled on their board? Weird...but the punters loved it, 9 bids took Cowshit's board up to a princely $1,325.

A bigger mystery than who is Cowshit is the provenance of this board. Here's the scenario: Non-surfer cleans out the attic and comes across surfboard, puts vague description (with measurement in centimetres) on eBay along with one photo. OK, the lone photo shows it's a Shaping Co. board from the early 80s, and going on the sheen it's in pretty good nick. That's all, no more info. So, would you roll the dice to find out its true condition? It went for a whopping $40 to an audacious gambling man or woman.

...and now for something completely. An early 70s fibreglass skatey replete with pointed nose, swallow tail, and clear red urethane wheels. It's made, or at least labelled, by Bob Brown Surfboards on the NSW Mid North Coast and the owner says it's unridden which seems a travesty. 9 bids took it to $311 and although I've no experience in antique skateys it's hard to imagine the new owner hasn't taken it for a blast on the nearest sloping street. Hot mix only.

Here's another classy looking ride. A 6'2" Shane single fin in the same resplendent shade of red as the wheels in the skateboard above. That glossy deck has must've been restored, especially seen in relation to the brown-stained bottom, but never mind the issue of originality, in this we're concerned with matters of comfort, and this board looks smooooth. 6 bids took it to a measly $305. Can't help thinking if it was one of Shane's more noted models it would've fetched a higher price.

In the same style as the Shane above, this Sam Egan singley is all about the ride. It's not the only thing the boards have in common, both shapers having sons that made the World Tour. Spooky, ooh yeah, but hardly a reason to bid on this stick. No, the three layered deck glass, classic early 70s styling, and primo condition are the things that catch my eye. But alas it didn't catch anyone elses, the board passed in at $375 without a bid.

Before Tony 'Doris' Eltherington was a grizzled Mentawai boat captain rescuing hapless South African's from the sea he was a grizzled board shaper from the north end of the Gold Coast. This board represents more of his former life than his latter: the deck is comprised of fluoro sunburst colours, the tail is stumpy and thick, the channels - the only feature that may work in Indonesian perfection - are classic 80s belly channels. 13 bids took it to a paltry $77. C'mon people, it's Doris.

Here's a bit more of the same from the Hayden factory on the Sunshine Coast. Hayden is a name loaded with history and prestige; McTavish ran some of his early experiments in vee out of Hayden Kenny's Alexandria Headlands factory. Unfortunately the Hayden name hasn't endured the same way Bob's has. Is it because Hayden's son Grant besmirched it by becoming a super clubbie and eating shitloads of Nutri Grain? Most probably. All blame aside this six channel, double flyer is a classic of the era, and was sold for a lowly $71. I blame Grant for that too.

Would I? Could I? Could you..? Ride this gleaming Hot Buttered that is. I'd be curious to see how it speared down the line, might even throw my hands over my head in a classic TF body jive to celebrate it. But what if it got damaged in the process? The board is fully restored, including a Martyn Worthington mural on the bottom, so it's already been trashed once in its life. When surfing it means damaging it, and it's a work of art, then the question needs to be asked: to ride or not to ride?

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